I will try to cover my view on how to focus on yourself and not others, also my reasons on why it is necessary and how it is helping me in my life. It might sound a bit selfish, and some people might argue it's essential to focus on others first; I will not argue with anyone; hear me out.
Life is not as long as you think, and we certainly don't know how long we have left either. I understand its sounds a bit negative, but the actual realisation of this has changed my life and how I spend my time to be precise.
I had a problem with my confidence for most of my life, and it was because I was thinking about what will people think about me.
I know this was a primary reason I had a low confidence level.
I realised - nobody cares!
Everyone has their issues and problems to worry about; nobody cares how you look, what you say, or how many push-ups you can do. Seriously - nobody gives a damn.
Why was it bothering me?
It was like that for as long as I remember. Back in my school days, what other people were thinking about me was bothering me, and I acted 99% of the time. Pretending I didn't care, but deep inside, It was important to me.
I was staying in my comfort zone, which slowed down my progress in life.
I was worried to do something I was not familiar with because other people's judgement played a massive role in my life.
If there is only one thing from this article to take, think about your goals. What do you want to achieve? Places you always wanted to visit.
It took me many years to realise - that we are responsible for our actions, and our actions will determine our future. We are in control of how to react in any single situation.
I know that where I am now is because of my past choices, and my future will depend on the choices I make today.
Dreams and goals
There are people out there who are very successful in all areas of their life. They have something in common, and they have goals, and every day they know what they need to do to get closer to their dream.
Many people have proved the power of visualisation, most athletes visualise their winning and how they will feel if they achieve their goal, and they give all focus to the process to get them there. They don't bother what other people say; they know what they want.
When people are young, they often get asked, what do you want to do or who do you want to be when you grow up? People with clear vision tend to achieve more in their life than people who live day by day without goals and purpose.
If you think I am perfect and know precisely what I want all my life, it's not true. Part of the reason I talk about it now is that I realised not long ago that I need clear goals in my life, and I cannot live day by day expecting I suddenly become successful. I need to stop thinking about other people's thoughts and focus on my path.
Sometimes what helps me is I picture someone very successful and ask myself, what would they do in this situation? They would not worry about what other people think and stick to what's essential.
I had a fear of public speaking for many years. If I knew I needed to do a presentation in front of a large group of people, I would not sleep for a few days prior. I would think about all the different scenarios in my head and will not focus on anything else.
I started to think, what would a successful person do in this situation? If they have a multi-million business to run and have a family, would they worry about presenting in front of people? Would they lose a night of sleep because of it? Would they worry about what the people in the audience think? Not. Their goals to achieve and present in front of people are just one piece of the puzzle on the road to success.
Remember - nobody cares if you messed up. It helped me become more focused on what's important to me and my journey to success.
Sometimes it is hard to do something new or is not something you are comfortable doing. The answer to this will be discipline. It's more complicated than many people say, but once you develop self-discipline and your goals are big, you are happy to go through some discomfort for future enjoyment.
I started developing a simple routine to get some discipline, which helped me. It can be as small as taking a cold shower every day, making a bed as soon as you get up, or doing daily meditation. Once you master small routines, bigger ones will be easier.
How to Focus on Yourself and Not Others? If you worry about other people's opinions and stop achieving your goals, that's a problem. Life is too short, and time is the most valuable asset. We should not waste our time worrying about what other people think or watching others achieve goals while sitting and wasting our lives ourselves.
Have goals. Think about - what other people would do in that situation and stop worrying. Once you develop self-discipline, you will not fear what other people are doing and focus on what's important to you.
Time is limited - we don't know how much we have left. Nobody knows.
Enjoy every moment.
I am for sure realised it and it changed my life, I became happier.
Thank you for your time, and I hope you found this article helpful; if you have any questions about it, please leave a comment below or feel free to reach out to me on the contact us! Page.
Have a great day.